Ch-ch-ch-changes.

Every now and then, or every six months as it seems, I come back to my blog with some reflections on life, love, and work. I have to say, it has been an absolutely wild six months. I honestly do not think my life has changed more since maybe high school, when things are so in flux it felt like changes were happening daily.

The most significant changes are the one’s that I have made in my personal life and professional life. To be brief and for the sake of privacy, I am now single. That decision sent a shock-wave through my personal life and I quickly found out who my real friends are. The less said about that situation, the better.

Professionally, I started my career! It has been such an exhilarating, exciting and, stressful time since I started at UMBC in June. After two weeks of working on campus, the director of our department abruptly resigned. Our department was in the midst of incredible change and the rest of the summer was proof of that: I had about 4 peers leave their various positions. There have been new people coming in and in a few short months, the department looks a bit different.

Somewhere in the midst of a crazy August, a loved one got cancer and her health rapidly declined (and by rapidly I mean within three weeks) and she passed away. Losing a loved one that quickly and that tragically knocked me on my ass. I wasn’t ready for it. Are we ever ready for it?

These changes are added to an already change filled year. My father getting heart surgery, supporting my sister through her personal struggles turned triumphs, graduating from my beloved Rutgers, and moving away from New Jersey for the first time in my life are a few more of the changes that happened in the beginning of this year. Through it all, I have had the support of my siblings, parents, friends and extended family. I couldn’t have done any of this without them. Even during the times when I had doubts, I was down, or just plain moody; there were amazing people to support me no matter where I turned. I owe them a great deal of thanks. (How appropriate with the holiday coming up.)

With a new chapter of my life beginning, I will welcome any and all of the changes. It is about time. Now that I am looking back, I think I hit a plateau or a rut these past few years. There were certain things that were great but there were certain things that weren’t and I was lying to myself about some of them. I am ready to move forward with a fresh outlook and attitude on life and the people I am surrounded by.

When my department was going through some serious change, my supervisor stopped me one day and asked, “Are you doing okay? These departmental changes can be scary for a new hire, especially when they happen so quickly after you start.” My response was applicable then and is still very appropriate given the times: “So much in my life has changed, I just picked up and moved to Maryland for instance, what’s a little bit more change?”

KB

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